un (t)ravel
Back in Helsinki.
Before I went to Ryazan I got a message where she said that she doesn’t want to be with me anymore. Well at least it’s clear.
Went to ryazan, I didn’t know anyone from there, feeling slightly sad. And I wondered, I don’t want this. I don’t want to travel from people to people who I don’t know, by myself, alone. not having even a base of anykind. So how will I change this? I know not, yet.
And it’s not that I’m alone there. Alma offered me great dinner and super company, Masha and her family was super as well… it’s just this… well.. something stable. I though that it would be so nice to travel and teach with somebody, although probably in a few weeks we would (who ever it would be) get into each others nervers a lot. I know not.
At the same time, I feel that the teaching in ryazan didn’t go so well… But in Moscow and in St.Peter I enjoyed a lot. Of course I am not sure that the people in WS enjoyed but I think most of them did. And even in Ryazan I saw some people really learning.
On my first “free” day in moscow, I played some guitar and did drums with garage band. I hope I get something of them done in these two weeks. I wanted to make 8cm cd’s again, but since I know not much of people really listen to cd’s anymore I’m thinking of making somekind of download system…
On tuesday… I went to see photobiannale thanks to Alma’s suggestion. Well before I went there I sat on a bench for an hour listening through William Basinski‘s Vivian & Ondine and meditating with it. And my my my, Mister Basinski has again done something miraclous. Absolutely brilliant, brilliant and shining, and deep.
Anyway, after I went to see the photos, and I realised how some of the photographers have really travelled a lot in 40-60 when the travelling wasn’t as nearly as easy as now. And how much they’ve must taken pictures and how many of them have been mediocre or crap. Because even now, there was maybe 1 or 2 really really Great photos from each photographer and most of them were, just, good.
After Ryazan I travelled to moscow, where I met Leilani which was great. She’s super adorable and I’m sure they’re enjoying contact tango a lot in moscow. Then I continued to petroskoi, petrozavodsk, where I met Sami and then Alexander and Sasha and Anna in city’s media center where we performed with Sami and Alex and Sasha making music.
Performing is great. It’s super challenging, it’s difficult, but at the same time it’s great. And performance was pretty good I think. Quite open impro, some themes that we had talked about, that came out in the movement I feel. And of course some base in CI. Alex and Sasha were doing really nice structurized impro with music stuff they had. And the place was full. Of cours it wasn’t a big place, but in a place like Petrozavodsk, I was surprised to get so much audience (all the seat were taken ans some people standing) and people also liked it. Great. It was also really nice see and talk with Sami about art and life and whatnot.
On my ways I read Ursula Le guin’s Birthday of the World. I recommend to everyone. Almost all of those stories are super. If you’re not into scifi, don’t worry they’re really not scifi. She’s writing about humans, about us and what we are. The last story Paradises Lost is amazing… in short place such a meaningful questions. Throw away of garbage, what does it mean. Where is away? This is something that we don’t really get. I don’t get. We live in the world where is easier to “throw away” (almost) any broken machine and get a new one than to fix it. But what is away? Away from my sight is not away. all of that material, all of that plastic metals what not stay here, in form or another. There is NO away, everything I throw I throw here, on this earth, on me.
If you haven’t heard from Ursula Le Guin, or if you haven’t read any of her books, do yourself a favour and start reading one. I can give more exact recommendations if needed.
“Rose said quote it’s time to make a mess
time will be soon in time I guess
she’s painting on my back
a beautiful flower pot
and she treats me like her local god
rose said quote it’s time to make a mess
this one’s yours and yours is selfobsessed
She’s painting on my back a green tom, the beefheart one
And she cuddles and she coos and she cuts the bullshit I confessed
She said:”Don’t look my way
What can I possibly say
I’ve never seen you before today
I’m just the one that makes you think of the one
that makes you feel you’re the one”
But thank you for the roses, for the roses…”
-dEUS
Another recommendation.
